Wednesday, November 02, 2005

What? You Know You Like Boyz II Men.

Even though I'm not completely sure what it stands for, I think I have PMS. I'm not depressed, but I do feel like giving up, dropping out of school, and spending the rest of my life stuffing tampons into my holes and trying to give myself oral sex. I think I need to steal some money and I need to do it soon. And I'm not talking about faking the time sheets at my $7 an hour job. I'm talking about robbing a bank and taking enough money to send me away for a lifetime of getting my asshole pounded by any inmate with ambition and the ability to overpower a 6'1'' 160 pound Boyz II Men fan. See, because I'm at the point in life where I realize that I'm never going to work hard enough to actually earn that kind of money, but not yet to the point where I'm willing to give up my dream of owning a 24 karat gold suit of medieval armor. Say some prayers everyone, this is a dangerous time for me.

4 Comments:

Blogger Blue LP said...

You'll make the biggest mistake of our lives. Don't do it, baby.

8:41 PM, November 02, 2005  
Blogger Kara said...

Yeah, that's pretty much word-for-word what I'm feeling. I'm not sure about the whole... being stuffed with tampons thing, but the 160 lb. inmate will do quite nicely.

I don't know how close you are to finishing school, but I can tell you that I have exactly 27 days left before I get my degree, and I'm still this [ ] close to throwing in the jizz-covered towel that I stole from your apartment.

9:11 AM, November 03, 2005  
Blogger JRae said...

Ugh, yes, I'm 3 years out of college and still feeling like that! I've also come to the conclusion that I probably won't want to work as hard as I need to to get the money I want, or will have to work in a job that I'll totally hate and will suck the soul out of me.

I guess this is growing up! The solution: stop wanting money and being materialistic and figure out what else makes you happy! :) And get a job where you make just enough to survive on...

11:42 AM, November 03, 2005  
Blogger gynagirl said...

What you need to do is go on a vacation somewhere. Pick a place where the beer is cheap & the women are whores. That'll cheer you right up. Personally I like the be a whore in Vegas. Plus you can't beat $1 pints of beer. God Bless Las Vegas....

12:40 PM, November 03, 2005  

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